I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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