she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
