Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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