Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
