Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
