During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize