we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
