She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
