And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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