put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
