Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
