That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
