Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
