Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Randomize
