tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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