I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
