Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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