covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
