i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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