hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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