omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
