They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
I CAN MOONWALK!
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
