in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize