Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Randomize
