Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
