yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
