It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Randomize
