Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
If that was your dad, he is hot
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
