dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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