Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
