Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
