It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Houston, we have a blender
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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