I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
