I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
