quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I touched a dick in church today
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
