I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
