I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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