You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
