Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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