So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
How does it feel to date your dad?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
