im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
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