thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
