I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
