Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
