Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
