Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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