Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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