If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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