she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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