garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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