do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
