Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
